Thursday, February 21, 2008

Rumblings

My own little journal is what this site has become. A place where I can create and just write. I never figured out, in my pragmatic way of thinking, why people liked writing and reading blogs so much. I think I get it a little more. I get to create and even sort through some of my own thoughts.

Do you all ever feel like you are swimming in a sea of thoughts? I feel that way now...there is SO much going on in my life with what I do, pain in the lives of people I love, and even dreams about where God's Church could go. What a privilege that God gives us to be so involved in life. We are not spectators, we are contributers to the way that the world shapes. Even beyond that, we are called to tell people about a Truth beyond our grasp. That Jesus was fully God, yet fully Man. That we would be forever separated from God without Jesus. That we participated in His death and resurrection. That the Spirit of God lives in the bodies of people who have chosen to fully give themselves to a connection to Christ.

How did I ever even get here? I mean, honestly! I am participating in a Truth I have no business even talking about. People want evidence for God, right? People think that fiaht is something that they can't grasp. Well, I think it has to begin with seeing it in the lives of the people that God has changed. You want evidence, look at me. God has turned my life on its head...I have gone from sexually addicted to leading others to healing in their own view and participation in sexuality. I have gone from pride to brokenness and humility, and yet, I have never been more filled with joy. I pray for things and they happen. God takes requests that
Kevin Lindsay Armstrong makes and turns them into reality. I have an opportunity to read about God, to experience Him in how the Holy Spirit communicates to me or stirs in my heart, I KNOW that no matter what I go through in this life I will have every tear wiped from my eyes and be with God forever.

This blog is called "Family." That is an interesting name for it given that no one from my family has ever commented on an entry...for all I know they have never even read one. That is OK, they don't need to. Yet, this is still the prayer that my spirit cries out to God as I write this: that my family would all be rescues out of their own personal despair to a real, vibrant, humble relationship with Jesus and with their true father, God. So, years from now, when someone from my family reads this, know that God is real, that prayer in powerful, and that faith is reckless in the world's eyes, but exhilarating in God's.

And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." Revelation 21.3-4

I want the old order to pass away. I want it to pass away for all of my family. Yet, it has to begin with a humble pursuit of and reliance on God. I pray that we, as a family, will be there one day...

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